VirginiaHam
1:24 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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How about shits in Thailand (hole, no toilet roll), France or Italy? Some bloke did an absolute shocker in an Italian stand up......huge brown streak, all across the wall., about knee height.
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Mad Dog
12:51 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Some sunday morning changing rooms at football were horrendous too.
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Mad Dog
12:50 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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The old north bank wasn't one of my finest hours.(But it did mean I missed millwall scoring the first in a 2-2 draw in 93)
Some nightclubs have been awful (specially when I had the trots in turnmills)
I did once shit in a hole on a golf course at 3am on canvey once (not proud of it)
Worst was probably some restaurant in Switzerland on a school trip 30 odd years ago. I had to hover and didn't dare flush as it was overflowing.
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zebthecat
12:45 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Had Salmonella food poisoning and it came on while I was fielding playing cricket. I will spare you the details but the whites had to go. Flu apart it is the worst I have ever felt.
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VirginiaHam
12:33 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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I had to stop for a dump at Wandsworth Town railway station in the middle of a 6 mile run on a Sunday morning. Completely fucks the run up.
Had to wipe my arse on the front page of a days old 'Sun' newspaper, since , of course there was no toilet paper.
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BRANDED
12:25 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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As a young lad I was on a trip to York with the school. Got desperate for a shit and found some public toilets. The cubical I goind myself in had a bowl litterally overflowing with faeces. Heaving. The shit was already edging out as I had already relaxed in the safe knowledge that the toilet was nigh. Anyway, pervhed over the mound and curled one out in top if it.
Fuck knows how I didnt puke all over it as well.
Scarpered pretty quick mind.
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VirginiaHam
12:16 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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This is a woeful thread. I have also contributed.
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young woody
12:13 Fri Nov 30
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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The old East Stand was a bit touch and go
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Crazy In Cremonese
11:48 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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In the bushes on the Epping-bound platform at Snaresbrook station. Which was nice.
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Dicko75
11:12 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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The dare of some of the local herberts at house parties when we were yoots was to scoop out the butter, take a shit in the tub and pack the butter back in. Hahaha....fucking gross.
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Dicko75
11:03 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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A mate of mine went in a bunker while we were playing a round at quite a prestigious local course. Buried it like a cat!! Have enjoyed sharing that with a few members I’ve met over the years - mostly they don’t laugh and just look at me with disgust.
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PwoperNaughtyButNot
11:00 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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2nd worse was many years back when me and two friends were robbing a warehouse. I had to take a shit and could see out of the window both my mates doing a runner being chased by the rozzers.
I’m sat there with a massive log half way out and the bill entering the building looking for more. I was shitting myself.
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PwoperNaughtyButNot
10:45 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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I woke up in the bath naked from the waist down when I was a teenager.
Very odd. Transpired that my old man had dropped me in there before pulling up the carpet on the stairs and chucking it outside.
Happened that I’d come home shit faced and desperate for a shit. I was So desperate that I tried to run up the stairs whilst taking my trousers down at the same time. By the time I got to the top of the stairs I was so tired I passed out and proceeded to gentley bounce down the stairs whilst curling one out.
When I woke up my dad was just coming in the front door returning from the local tip.
That’s the worst place I’ve had a poo
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Bungo
10:30 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Many years back a bloke I know pulled down the pub and they went back to her small flat. In tow was another mate from the pub who basically tagged along with them even though he really shouldn’t have, but was no doubt hoping for some leftovers.
Fast forward an hour or two, friend one is in the bedroom of the bird’s flat with her, getting it on. Friend two is in her lounge, now desperate for a dump.
Turns out the only bog there is in the bathroom accessed through her bedroom. Even he realised that popping through at that moment would not be welcome, so he did the only thing he could think of, and shat in her kitchen sink.
Then having the inevitable problem of getting it down the plughole, he did the only other thing he could think of which was to reach for her potato masher.
I’ve never been able to look at a potato masher without retching a little since, and now you won't be able to either..
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,
10:24 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Gilwell Park.
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Sven Roeder
10:09 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Bloke I worked with reckoned that after a long unsuccessful day at Doncaster races coming out they walked past a bookies Rolls Royce & one of his mates curled one out on the bonnet.
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bruuuno
9:54 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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A couple of years ago me and a mate spent three days tench fishing over sywell reservoir in northants. No public toilets so we just shit in plastic bags.
At the end of the trip I got the short straw so had to take all the rubbish and bags of shit in my car to dump in the bin somewhere.
As me and my mate we’re driving in convoy on the way out of the area I drove past this house that had a big Tottenham flag out the front.
I couldn’t resist so pulled up the motor in the middle of the street on a sunny Sunday morning and emptied the rubbish along with three days worth of mine and my mates curry fed shit all over the cunts driveway.
All to my mates infinite amusement sat in the car behind mine watching events unfold
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yogib
8:39 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Circa 1979...went on a school trip to either Regents Park or London Zoo. Got dropped off at School which was a 15-20 minute walk home....was busting for a piss and found a bush to fertilise...cue 5 mins later a tortoise head appeared....tight clenching and walking fast was a problem......got to the point where I was about 200yds from home and couldn't hold it anymore.....thank fuck for C&A pants as they held in my release as I had no choice but to ruin a pair of Sta Press Tonic strides as well.
Had to use my record money to get another pair from Mr Byrite!
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monto
8:36 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Probably the Ferndale in Beckton.
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lab
8:23 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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Amongst the plants on a cliff near rockley park Dorset . It looked like the dhansak I'd eaten the night before . The view over Brownsea island was pleasant though.possibly the best place vie had a poo , I think some house martens used it for nest building .
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VirginiaHam
8:07 Thu Nov 29
Re: Worst place you’ve had a poo.
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mike hunt 7:58 Thu Nov 29
Golf courses must take a pummelling. I played for the Professional Cricketers Golf Society at the Berkshire, no less, and had a 'no choice' dump in the azaleas on 13. I had to wipe my arse on receipts I'd kept in my wallet.
The club captain's retriever was snufflling around nearby. She walked all 36 holes and didn't steal one ball.
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